fun with chemistry

I never had one of those home chemistry sets, they were all a little tame for my distinguished tastes.

Well the answer is here my friends...

[the screen is filled with crazy flashing lights]

excited voice:
It's here!!!

excited voice:
The toy that you've dreamed about!!!

excited voice:
Fun for the whole family!!!

excited voice:
It's the home 'Chemistry and Cocktail set'

[the package of the kit spins into the forefront]

excited voice:
Our kit contains many of the base ingrediants to make your favorite substances right in your own home.

excited voice:
Just add some water and chemistry and soon you'll be making things such as...

[the excited voice speeds up while listing off the possibilities]

excited voice:
whiskey, PVC, bourbon, asbestos, nylon, cognac, arsenic, methyl-hydroxyethyl-cellulose, moonshine, MDMA, and much much more!!!

excited voice:
Best of all, get your kids the set and you'll be enjoying sweet sweet homemade substances at you convenience.

[cut to a room where a kid is wearing goggles behind some chemistry gear. His dad is swaggering around drunk holding a drink. They are both happy, having clearly bonded]

excited voice:
Exclusively from Alchotech, only 39.95.

Posted by dustin on September 17, 2003 with category tags of

3 comments
Dustin. Read your 'polio for men' skit. Funny.
   comment by funnyguy (#95) on September 17, 2003

Good, I especially like the listing of the substances. But, I ESPECIALLY like the phrase "enjoying homemade substances".
   comment by Chronomorph (#11) on September 19, 2003, Rated it 4


I would change the ingredient listing to include several mixed drinks. Nix the asbestos ;)
   comment by Snicker on May 13, 2004, Rated it 4

   

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