Feeling skittish?

Gil gets interviewed. He thinks.

The Interview

[Samuel sits at a desk sorting papers in his office in a shirt and tie. Behind him sits a raffle barrel, the kind that spins and has a small door on the side for putting in names or tickets. Gil enters the office wearing a business suit and hat.]

Gil: Hello?

Samuel: Come in! Come in!

Gil: This is the Charlotte Agency, right?

Samuel: The very one! Samuel Charlotte, at your service! [points to chair] Please make yourself comfortable.

G: Thanks.

S: Well, let's get down to it. You can start by filling out this form.

[S hands G a small slip of paper about the size of a business card. G takes it from S. S starts to fill a form on his desk.]

G: Um...

S: [looks up from form] Yes?

G: Nothing.

S: [smiling broadly] S'allright! S'allright!

[G takes out a pen and fills it in. It takes about 5 seconds.]

G: [holds out paper] Uh, here.

[S takes the paper.]

S: [reading] Gil Gardner. [looks up] Great! [puts paper in the raffle barrel]

G: That was the correct form, right?

S: Oh, absolutely! Absolutely!

G: So it was only supposed to ask my name?

S: Well, now. Well, now. The second half of the interview does the rest.

G: Ah. Good.

S: Right then. Right then. Let's begin.

[S takes a new form from out of a drawer and looks at it.]

S: Oh damn.

[S starts rifling through the raffle barrel]

S: I've forgotten your name.

G: It's --

[S pulls out random name.]

S: Are you... [reading] Wang-Si Mah?

G: I'm Gil Gardner, sir.

S: That's it. Gil Gardner. Excellent. [puts paper back] Good memory. I like that. I like that.

[G shifts uncomfortably. S start filling in the form he took out of the drawer in silence. S looks up occasionally at G, eyeing him. G sits up straight. S shakes his head and fills something out on the form. This repeats a couple of times, each time S eyeing G, shaking his head and filling in the form.]

S: [filling in form] No, definitely not.

G: Not what, sir?

[S acts as though he hasn't heard the question. S looks at form again and looks up, speculatively.]

S: Not a chance.

G: Sir?

[S returns to the form.]

G: Has the interview begun?

S: Hm? [looks up] Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Almost done. [returns to form]

G: If you have any questions for me, I'd be glad to answer them.

S: [doesn't look up] Yes, answers. Answers. Hmm. [looks up] Hah! [speaks to form] This one? Not bloody likely! Ha ha! [fills in more of the form]

G: Sir, if I could --

S: Done!

G: Done?

S: Oh, wait. Almost forgot. [scribbles on form and says out loud as he writes it out] Good memory.

G: So, how did I fare?

S: Can't say. Can't say. [gets up and offers hand] You'll be getting a letter one way or another.

G: [gets up and shakes hand] Well, thanks for your time.

S: Not at all. Not at all.

[After G has left S turns to raffle barrel and spins it idly.]

Posted by vinny9 on October 23, 2002 with category tags of

6 comments
I liked how offbeat this skit was. I also liked the metaphorical use of the two halves of the interview. Impressive non-use of puns, also.
   comment by anonymous on October 28, 2002, Rated it 4

I like how each person has a definite character. The timing and non-verbal communication are just right! I'm think Al Pacino in the rol of S.
   comment by Bryan (#22) on October 29, 2002, Rated it 4

Oh hey, I can spell! That might have worked better as "I'm thinking Al Pacino in the roll of S."
   comment by Bryan (#22) on October 29, 2002

Which do you prefer? I'm Think or The Backstreet Boys?
   comment by anonymous on October 30, 2002

I likes it.
   comment by Chronomorph (#11) on May 15, 2003, Rated it 4

Why do I smell 'Monty Python' ?

This kind of skit relies heavily on the actors and
their keen sense of comic timing. Very British.
   comment by funnyguy (#95) on September 16, 2003, Rated it 3

   

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