Corky the Moonboy

Sometimes, the most touching moments are the ones you least expect.

(Another McImprov sketch that's been sitting around, waiting to be typed up.)

Updated to incorporate the new ending.

[Enter Billy, a nine-year old boy with a t-shirt and generic baseball cap. He runs over to talk to his Mom, who is cooking at the stove.]

Billy: Mom! Mom! Can Corky come over for dinner?

Mom: Corky?

Billy: Yeah, with the glasses! Remember?

Mom: Is that the boy from camp? With the strange teeth?

Billy: No, you're thinking of Antoine. Corky has BROWN hair. You met him at the Science Fair.

Mom: Oh. The moon boy.

Billy: Yeah.

Mom: [sighs] All right. I'll put on a little more pork.


[The doorbell rings.]

Billy: Corky!!!

[Billy opens the door, revealing a small boy with a t-shirt and a space-age oxygen-breathing apparatus. He is Corky and he is from the moon.]

Billy: Hooray!!!

Corky: [muffled] Hooray!!!

[Corky presses a button on his mask. His mask slides open. Corky makes a clear, contended sigh. ("Ahh!")]

[The family sit around the Dinner Table, with Dad at one end, Mom at the other, and Corky and Billy sitting beside each-other. There is a large red button on the table beside Billy. Dad wears a sweater.]

Dad: Pass the salt, moonboy!

Billy: [pleading] Daaad....

[Corky sighs. He is sitll wearing his mask. He reaches for the salt but cannot lift it with his weak moon muscles. He sweats and strains. Billy watches on: silent, earnest, aghast (like someone watching a train-wreck). Mom looks-on, slumped, as if tired of Corky's shenanigans.]

Dad: The salt! Pass it!

[Corky keeps straining.]

Billy: Dad, he's too weak in Earth gravity.

Dad: What, does it make him six times the wimp?

Mom: Oh, Arnold. Go easy on the moonboy.

Billy: His name is Corky!

Corky: [quietly, sadly] It's true.

[Corky sighs and stares out the window at the moon.]

Billy: So I was thinking that after dinner we would go downstairs and play hopscotch.

Mom: That sounds very nice.

Billy: Corky says he's really good at hopscotch. He says he can jump really high.

Dad: Is that so, moonboy?

[Corky is still staring out the window.]

Dad: Moonboy?

Mom: Moonboy, are you all right?

Corky: Oh, I'm sorry. I was simply staring at my home. longing for the high, grey mesas of the Sea of Tranquility, the lustrous sands of Umlak-Kre-Hova-Hova, our capital.

Dad: You shittin' me?

Billy: Dad, I think he's the messiah.

[Hawaiian music starts a hula dancer enters. Corky and hula dancer dance to hawaiian music. Billy, Mom, and Dad bow at Corky's feet. Corky steps out of scene.]

Corky: Hi folks. I'm not actually from the moon. My real name is Joseph Gallagher. But this is a serious issue. Racism has to stop.

[hawaiian music starts again, and Corky and hula dancer hula off stage.]


Posted by McImprov on March 27, 2003 with category tags of

Really good (gnarly). The surprise ending was weird but enjoyable. But, why does the moonboy open his mask? Shouldn't he have to keep it operational at all times?
   comment by anonymous on March 5, 2003, Rated it 4

I really like it. But I don't get the red button bit.
   comment by dustin (#1) on March 6, 2003, Rated it 5

All hail the moonboy!!!
   comment by anonymous on April 3, 2003, Rated it 4

i didnt like the ending you could have come up with something funnier if you put in the time

i 2 dont understand the deal with the red button
otherwise it was AWESOME!
   comment by anonymous on May 9, 2003, Rated it 4

I didn't think it was funny at all. And if he couldn't life the salt because of the gravity on the moon, then how can he stand up?
   comment by anonymous on June 27, 2003, Rated it 1

Because it's make-believe.
   comment by dustin (#1) on July 3, 2003

I didn't get the red button, or opening the mask, or the ending. The dad was really funny though.
   comment by anonymous on December 26, 2003, Rated it 3


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