Geriatric wants to enroll in college.
Gaylen Husborough, an 87 year old neurotic with plenty of money and free time, decides to call for some information regarding enrollment and orientation. He telephones the school and is connected with the over-eager young representative, Jason Baker.*Telephone rings*
Jason: Thank you for calling AAU, How may I help you today?
Gaylen: *coughs* *clears throat rather loudly, followed by a loud spitting sound.* (he is oblivious to the fact that someone has answered)
Jason: (with a startled look) Hello? Is anyone there?
Gaylen: (lost look on his face) Hello?
Jason: Yes, thank you for calling AAU, THis is Jason, How may I help you?
Gaylen: Hello?? Is somebody there? Hello? (presses random buttons, sending loud beeps into jason's ear)
Jason: (slightly raising his tone) Hello sir... Yes..Hello there, May I help you?
Gaylen: Oh! Hello! My name is Gaylen Husborough, and I want to enroll in your college as a freshman.
Jason: And what is your intended major?
Gaylen: No sir, Leiutenant. Whole company cut down by machine gun fire.
Jason: Excuse me sir?
Gaylen: You ever see what a hand grenade will do to your average 170 pound man, son?
Jason: No sir, I can't say that I have......
Gaylen: It'll make him shit his trousers and run the other direction! (pasty laughter echoes from the old man)
(a weak smile cuts across Jason's face, finding the man's laugh more humorous than his actual joke)
Jason: I bet....anywho....let's get started. I need just a little bit of information from you and then you will be good to go.
Gaylen: Hello there, My name is Gaylen Husborough and I'm interested in enrolling in your college as a freshman.
Jason: Yes I am aware of that sir.
Gaylen: I don't rightly recollect liking your type.
Jason: Sir do you have an intended major, or are you undecided?
Gaylen: Don't get short with me young man.
Jason: Mr. Husborough I assure you that I have no intentions of being rude or short with you this afternoon, I am merely trying to assess your goals.
Gaylen: I feel like you are giving me ultimatims and rushing my decision.
Jason: Sir, I've done nothing of the sort, I am merely trying to figure out your intended major!
Gaylen: Do they serve Buttermilk Biscuits there? All I eat is Buttermilk Biscuits, on account of my sour stomach.
Jason: Sir, I feel like this conversation is going nowh............
(high pitch feedback from gaylens hearing aid rips through the reciever and Jason jumps back from the phone wincing.)
Jason: Hello?
Gaylen: My name is Gaylen Husborough and I would like to enroll in your college as a freshman.
Jason: Let me connect you to Cathy in admissions.
(Jason drops the reciever of the phone in the office blender and turns it on high as he packs his things to leave for the day.)
The end
| Posted by AlexDelage on January 21, 2004 with category tags of Skit |
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Written by AlexDelage
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