The Idol of Reality Show Island
Wow! There's a lot of reality TV these days, am I right?! Also, airplane food is bad and hey, don'tcha think women sure are different than men?Voice Over: From the network that brought you “Sleazy Castle” and “The Rules Clearly Specify that I Get Married at the End of this Show” comes an exciting revolution in reality television:
(Cut to a dank, poorly lit room filled with nerds and crumpled paper. One particularly nerdy fellow sitting on a couch taping a pencil against his mouth)
Nerd 1: I’ve got it! “Allurement Hotel!” We put 8 couples in a hotel where they’re pitted against each other for a new car and a chance to be a butler/maid combo to the celebrity of their choice!
Nerd 2: I’ll do you one better: “Butler Hotel!” Fourteen butlers are stranded in a hotel in Northern Wisconsin and are forced to select the best chef for the hotel kitchen from a group of seven sexy supermodels. The last butler to have sex with a model wins!
VO: “The Idol of Reality Show Island…”
(The host of the show addresses the group in a series of dramatic close-ups.)
Host: A bakers dozen of professional writers are each forced to come up with a pitch for a reality show. They’ll be judged by four top network executives with cancelled sit-com positions to fill.
(The series’ tagline appears on the screen, as it is spoken off-camera by the host)
Host: (very dramatically) Writers…you write now.
(Suspenseful music begins)
VO: Only one will win.
Nerd 1: (panicked) Is anyone else doing a “Survivor” rip off!?
(As half the room raises their hands he crumples up his papers and runs out of the room)
VO: Only one show will be produced…
Nerd 2: (tense) 39 supermodels fly to Maine to create the best method of collecting lobsters. They only have twelve hours, from midnight to noon, to get as many as possible.
Nerd 3: What’s it called?
Nerd 2: “Clock Lobster.”
VO: …unless Ray Romano decides to retire as well…
Nerd 1: Twelve guys compete for the love of eight women, who are actually male elementary school teachers.
Nerd 3: Who are actually male library directors!
Nerd 1: They already made that one!
VO: “The Idol of Reality Show Island.” Coming this Monday, following “Check Out that Lady! I Did and She Had a Penis!”
| Posted by Ramso on May 25, 2004 with category tags of Skit |
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Written by Ramso
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