Here's A Skit

Written quickly but with love

Girard, a young boy, arrives at Calligraphy Camp.

[He takes a sleeping bag, a pillow, paper and pens out of his sack. Girard picks up his pens and paper and proceeds to the main cabin for lessons]

Teacher:
Please inscribe the following phrase: “Weary Wally wept at will.” And with flourish, everyone, with flourish!

[G writes]

[Teacher comes over to inspect]

Teacher:
What is this, Girard? This sheet produces no fanfare! No ‘tarantara’ is issued when it is spied! What, pray-tell, is this garbled mess?

G:
“Weary Wally wept at will”, sir.

T:
And in what language are you writing, my boy? Which ancient alphabet have you unearthed and so cleverly employed for us today, hmm?

G:
It’s English, sir and the font I’m using is Wing-Dings.

T:
Wing-Dings!?!

[Teacher looks shocked and slowly turns to look at the chalk board]

On the other side of the board is a group of cloaked Agents who have been monitoring the situation.


Agent1:
[Looking back into the classroom]: The prophecy has come true! Someone has finally cracked the Wing-dings code!

Agent2:
[Hands clenched in anticipation]: The time when the world will be united under the yoke of one ruler and one font is now!

Agent3:
[Holding a photograph of Bill Gates]: The Dark Lord must be apprised of the situation immediately!

[All 3 Agents cackle wildly]

Outside in the idyllic splendor of the Calligraphy Camp. A man in fishing gear addresses the audience.

Man:
[Foot up on one box]: Hello everyone, this is Harvey Mendellson for the Catholic Association for Countering Amorality or CACA. We all love [does quotes with fingers] “experimenting” and trying “new things” but when it comes to fonts there is only one [with quotes] “right”, I mean [no quotes] right way to be. We here at CACA are firmly united against all wicked fonts or the “Prints of Evil” as we like to call them. Heh. But seriously folks stick to Times New Roman and you will assuredly have a seat saved for you [points to audience] up in Heaven. Thank you and God Bless.

Posted by Chronomorph on August 6, 2003 with category tags of

7 comments
I love the Wing Dings stuff. The agents, the font camp, great setup. But the ending? That's some sharp turn. I think if you draw out the first part of the skit to a good length, you'd have some seriously funny stuff.
   comment by vinny9 (#33) on August 7, 2003, Rated it 3

I like it a lot, especially the end. Making fun of religion = good.
*ducks the various objects thrown at him*
   comment by TANK (#89) on August 7, 2003, Rated it 4

Yes! The skit DOES need more funniness! Actually,
it does need some fleshing out. As the blurb said, the skit was written quite quickly.
   comment by Chronomorph (#11) on August 7, 2003

Yeah, okay. Limited audience. Those teacher's assistants are having a good snort, though.
   comment by anonymous on September 15, 2003, Rated it 3

Yeah, okay. Limited audience. Those teacher's assistants are having a good snort, though.

Whoah! Deja vu? No, I just forgot to login and had to claim my opinion . . . I am not one to comment annonymously.
   comment by funnyguy (#95) on September 15, 2003, Rated it 3

Anonymity is a matter of degree, isn't it Mr. um, Funnyguy?

BTW, you voted TWICE on the same skit. Again!
   comment by Bryan (#22) on September 15, 2003

Damn it! Am I not playing the game right?
An associate turned me on to this lovely
site, and I just can't stop myself. Always
on the lookout for fresh material and/or
potential, comic writers. Thanks for the tender
guidance, though. Will be checking yours out
very soon!
   comment by funnyguy (#95) on September 16, 2003

   

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