April Foo's Battle of Wits

Congratulations to Alex, who wins last week's Battle of Wits, for this non-entry:

Q:Come up with the tackiest newspaper headline for a tragedy (current, historical, or imaginary)

A: Kennedy, King, Lennon: You've Been Punked!

Alex therefore receives an informative fridge magnet.

This Week's Battle:

Johny Cochrane used "If the Glove Don't Fit, You Must Acquit" to defend O.J. Since then, many more celebrities have had legal troubles. What rhyming couplet would Cochrane use to defend one of them?

Examples:
If Jacko didn't diddle, he deserves an acquittal.
If he didn't fly the plane, free he'll remain. (Osama)

PRIZE: The winner receives one or more fortune cookies.

You have until April 16 at 5:00 p.m.

Posted by chrisdye on April 1, 2004 with category tags of

5 comments
If it ain't on video, there's no way he did it, yo. (Kobe Bryant)
   comment by Adrienne (#149) on April 1, 2004

To one breast, you cannot masturbate
Miss Jackson you must exonerate
   comment by vinny9 (#33) on April 1, 2004

Since some bodies might be eaten,
The prosecution has been beaten.
(Robert Pickten, BC serial killer, hog farmer)
   comment by Reverend_Jerry (#40) on April 1, 2004

For the Martha Stewart trial:

If the broker didn't know,
Martha, must be let go

For Milosovic:

If less than a million people died,
can you really call it genocide?
   comment by stretch (#87) on April 2, 2004

For Martha Stewart

If a juror lied about his criminal background
Then not-guilty my client must be found
   comment by trckands (#152) on April 3, 2004

   

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